One of the surest ways to make someone feel that you are insincere is to have them perceive you as if you are using a scripted effort at "being" sincere.
At that second, trust begins to evaporate. I call this the "Yikes, I've lost them!" moment.
The defining mark of being a professional at your craft is performing the task-at-hand in a seemingly effortless fashion.
There is no easy way to gain this seamless proficiency without practicing what we want to achieve with relentless persistence until it becomes part of our nature.
For example:
We no longer think about getting on a bicycle and pedaling down the garden path; however, I suspect there isn't one reader here who doesn't vividly remember falling off his/her bicycle before learning how to find his/her balance. We skinned our knees because the very thing we were trying to achieve distracted us.
I've played the piano since I was a little boy and went on to play professionally for many years. In the beginning, I was aware of every single key on the keyboard. After countless hours of practice, my mind and eyes no longer thought about my fingers. Once I stopped being aware of what I was doing, the mechanical playing of notes turned into - music.
So, how do we achieve a natural flow in our real estate presentations?
Some agents use video cameras. This is fine, but it's not in real time. Life is not a scripted reality show. (There's an oxymoron.) If you think you don't look sincere on camera, it may simply be your own perception of you being "aware" of yourself! Ego is hard to self-ignore. The world is saturated with You Tubesque amateurs. You Tube is a good place to go if you want to see how not to look.
Other agents will talk into a mirror. This does help if you can remove yourself from the situation - which is a hard thing to do since (again) you're looking at yourself. If you can't remove yourself, mirrors are very good if you want to get the listing on your own house…
The best suggestion I have ever received is from an actor. He advised, "Look into the camera and speak as if you are talking to a trusted friend...or a loved one." In our case, we are looking into the eyes of our clients instead of the camera.
The only "trick" is you have to mean what you say.
This method allows you to adjust your notes to your own emotional variables and you can practice your presentation using nothing more than an empty chair and your own imagination. The most important element is to be yourself. People have an inner sense of someone making a genuine effort. (Don't you?)
(Tip: If you are in your office, you may want to make people in the immediate area aware you are practicing talking to an imaginary person in an empty chair. If not, the next morning you may find all sharp objects have been removed from your desk - and/or you've been possibly nominated for Congress.)
When we first meet serious clients they are evaluating us from a highly emotional angle. Senses are heightened and the primal "fight or flight" instincts are close to the surface. One wrong nuance and we could lose them.
Of course, real estate is a business - but it's a business that concentrically effects our clients and their families on a very core level.
Whether it is expressed or not, we are being judged from the heart as well as the head.
Personally, I find great satisfaction in having gained the trust of my clients to the point where they are signing an agreement without a hint of worry or hesitation
If we "internalize" the commitment to our clients by knowing our craft and expressing an honest desire in helping to the extent that their needs become our own - we are doing our jobs at an elevated level.
It is only when we cease being "aware" of these efforts that we achieve the highest degree of natural sincerity.
